Being engaged is such an amazing time in your lives for so many reasons. The most obvious is that you are getting to marry the person of your dreams! The love and support from friends and family, outpouring from every direction is also so wonderful, and sometimes overwhelming. Plus- you get to throw this big huge party and look like a princess without feeling ridiculous. Well- ok, while only feeling slightly ridiculous.
But sometimes in the hecticness of planning a wedding, you can forget to take a step back, and take the opportunity to enjoy this amazing time in your lives. It’s usually a pretty short time span- with the average engagement being about one year, but it’s a time you should really share being excited about the rest of your lives together. It’s so easy to get swept up in vendor meetings, shopping for shoes and overall wedding research, but follow these five steps to ensure that you and your future hubs have an amazing engagement!
1. Keep dating each other!
Set up regular date nights that get you out of the house (which becomes wedding central during an engagement!) Take a walk around the park, grab some thai, try something new together! Sounds easy enough, right? So- what’s the kicker you ask?
No wedding talk allowed! From the time you walk out of wedding central, to the time you take a step back in, neither one of you are allowed to bring up color palettes, guest lists, centerpieces or music choices. This is a time to reconnect and remember that this time in your life isn’t about planning a wedding it’s about the beginning of a marriage!
2. Hire a wedding planner!
You’ll hear me say this time and time again. Hire a wedding planner, for Pete’s sake! I guarantee it will be the one thing you’ll be happiest you spent your money on looking back. SO many brides don’t realize the value of a wedding planner until it’s too late. I can’t tell you how many brides have said to me, “ I thought I could handle it, until the week of. How am I supposed to coordinate vendors, set up my venue and get ready on the day of when I’m so anxious about the fact that I’m getting married today!”
Let the planner take the stress off of your shoulders, so you can enjoy your man (and so that he can stand to be around you!)
3. Remember- Loosey Goosey!
It’s so so so so easy to get caught up in wedding planning. It’s engrained in our minds from a very young age that it’s the biggest, most important and perfect day of our lives. Anything less than that just won’t do. So when you can’t find the perfect shade of napkin color choice to match the sage green leaves of your centerpieces- just try to remember that you are freaking out over something that people will be wiping their mouths with. No one is going to notice if it doesn’t match exactly. And even if it did match exactly- unfortunately no one would think twice about it. Because it’s a napkin, and again, they are going to be using it to wipe crumbs off themselves.
Same to be said for any detail of the wedding. Yes- it’s amazing when everything matches, and it’s beautiful when the music starts at the right time just as you’d planned it and it’s so wonderful when everything goes perfectly… But it’s not the end of the world if it isn’t ‘perfect.’ I double pinky promise, and would triple and quadruple if I had more pinkies, that you will be the ONLY one who notices anything that isn’t what you’d planned!
So take a step back and a deep breath in when there’s a kink in the planning. Do your best to straighten it out as much as possible, and then let it go!
4. There’s more to life than wedding planning!
As stated in the last section, it’s so easy to let wedding planning take grasp of your entire being. You’ll dream about it, you’ll toss and turn over bridesmaid dress options, you’ll find yourself daydreaming about it at work, and crying on your way home from it because the song you chose for your father-daughter dance just came on. Remember that this is all normal, (relatively speaking anyway) behavior, and that you are still sane.
But also remember that there is more to life than wedding planning. Remember to hang out with your girls and try to talk about non wedding things. Remember to ask how they are, and talk about things they are excited about. Attend family functions with a smile. Doing normal things and not talking or thinking about wedding planning will help to take your mind off of things and will leave you feeling refreshed and ready to tackle some more planning.
5. Be organized!
This is so terribly important in the long run for your sanity! Being organized won’t only make life easier for you, but will make life easier for your vendors and anyone helping you during this process. Keep receipts in a binder, start your lists on google drive so they are always there when you need them, keep an updated pinterest account as opposed to magazine clippings- again easier to access and a lot less messy.
Same with your house. Designate one room for wedding planning, so only one room becomes plastered with all things wedding related. This way- when you get overwhelmed, you can go to another room to escape. One tip for this? Make your bedroom your sanctuary. Your man will be happier for it!
Staying organized will save you time in the future, and will keep you feeling confident in your planning. This will leave you more time to relax and enjoy your engagement.
Your engagement is the foundation of your marriage, and it’s so important for this to be a healthy time in you and your fiance’s relationship! So take time to enjoy one another and some time to relax and your marriage will be off to a running start!